God Answers Prayers!

           Finding out that getting pregnant was not going to be the “piece of pie” we always expected it to be was a surprise for us.  Being from a large family with lots of cousins, I always believed that babies were a blessing, but I didn't know sometimes you had to work for them!  In high school, they make it sound like if you look at each other wrong- BOOM! You’re pregnant.  What do you mean, it’s going to be hard getting pregnant?  We did everything right! That’s not fair!

Then the fear set in. 

I have always said that my number one worst fear was not being able to get pregnant when I was ready.  Always.  Being a mommy is one of the top things I want out of life and not knowing the paths we would have to take threw me into a panic.  I was terrified.  I threw more than my fair share of pity parties. 

But God has a better plan.  He always does. 

My husband patiently pointed that out to me.  I have been so weak during this struggle and Will really stepped in and challenged me to handle it Biblically.  He challenged me to stay away from self-pity and bitterness and to trust in God’s plan, even though it’s not the plan I wanted for myself.  His plan is better. 

So I began reading through the Psalms and praying that God would remove my fear and replace it with trust in His perfect plan and joy to do all things for His glory. 

It didn't happen overnight.  In fact, it took me about a year to notice how He had worked in my life to answer these prayers.  I was looking back through prayer requests from a year ago when I saw this one written down and all of a sudden realized- wow! God said yes to that one!  He really has been working on my heart and I didn't even notice. 

One of the biggest turning points I can pin point was when I read Psalm 37.  Here are a few selected verses that God has spoken to my heart.  

“Do not fret […]Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.  Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.  Commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him and He will do this […] Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him […] Refrain from anger and turn away from wrath;  do not fret- it leads only to evil.” 

God is so good! He has answered my prayer.  He has removed my fear and replaced it with trust and joy.  I can’t explain it either.  I just know that he has spoken to me through my husband who is a rock and seeks the Lord, through Psalms, through specific worship songs, and through other people He has placed in my life.  I now have a peace that it is going to happen for us, we just don’t know how or when yet.  But God does.  And after almost 2 years of fighting with Him, I am finally learning to be OK with letting God be in control and trusting in His plan.  I have taken so much joy in telling the stories of the amazing things God is doing in our lives.  I know it sounds weird, but I get so excited when I find someone to talk to who understands, because I love to tell the stories of the things God is teaching us.  I am more in love with my husband than I ever have been and one of the reasons is because of how Will is constantly challenging me to handle things Biblically and I respect and love him for that.  And, most importantly, we have both fallen more in love with the Lord because of this journey. 

Our God is a good one who wants good things for His children.  He is a God who answers prayers- even if the answer is sometimes “Wait a little bit for My perfect timing.”.